Me: "Hey buddy, what would you like for dinner?"
Chris: "Cookies!"
Me: "Cookies huh? I don't think that is a good idea. What would you like for dinner?"
Chris: "Cookies Momma!"
Me: "You can have cookies AFTER you eat your dinner. How about a sandwich?"
Chris: "No shanwish Momma, Cookies!"
Me: "If you eat ALL your sandwich, you can have a cookie."
Chris: "I want cookies, cookies and cookies...pahleezzzz."
He finally got that cookie...AFTER he had his sandwich!!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Friday, September 3, 2010
Guilt
I have days where I feel like I am a fantastic Mom. I also have days, where I feel like I could be doing so much better. This is normal right?? To question one's parenting skills?? I don't know...I just look at my children and I often wonder if I am teaching them as much as they are teaching me. Could I be doing more? I feel horrible when I lose my patience, raise my voice, or want to spend 15 minutes to myself. I know they will not stay this young forever and that really gets me. I love watching them grow, learn, and change with each passing day, but I am so scared for the days that they want nothing to do with me. I know I have a while before that happens, but I can't help but think about it. I am trying so hard to cherish every moment I have with them, but I sometimes feel it just isn't enough. That I should be spending every minute of every day with them. I feel guilty when I sit at my computer and watch a show or surf the Internet. I mean, those are minutes I could be spending with them. I know it sounds a little crazy, but it's how I feel. Especially in this moment.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Princess
Today, I realized just how "girlie" my daughter truly is. She wanted to wear a dress today. She even brought me the exact dress she wanted to wear. It is a beautiful turquoise, sleeveless, flowing in the wind, type of dress. I put it on her and her whole face lightens up. She grabs a bit of fabric in each hand and twirls around the kitchen. I just have to shake my head and chuckle a little bit...where does she get this prissiness. After watching her little performance, I decided to put her hair in a little ponytail. This she also loves. She came prancing into our living room and passed her big brother, who looked at her with wide eyes and said, "Momma, sissy is a pretty princess." I just smiled and said, "Yes, yes she is honey." She will always be my little pretty princess and he will always be my little man. Forever and Always!
Saturday, August 28, 2010
The Crow
Yesterday, the children and I were taking a nap when I heard a tapping at my back door. It is a sliding glass door, so I was able to see what was making the noise. A crow had stepped up on our back porch and tapped the door, to annoy our dogs, or so I thought. Well, the dogs went crazy and off flew that crazy bird.
Later that day, I called my mother to tell her about my day. Of course, I had to share the story of the bird. She then explained to me how some people believe that Crows are Messengers. I looked it up online and sure enough, she was right. Countless cultures look at the crow as a harbringer of powerful secrets. The business of the crow is in both keeping and communicating deep mysteries. The crow is often heard to cackle utterances that sound like, "cras, cras.' The actual word cras is tomorrow in Latin. This information helps fuel the fire in that Crows foretell the future and reveal omens and signs. All of this brings me to this morning....
Mike and I packed up the kids to take them to Playtown, the indoor playground I told you all about. We stopped for gas and headed on our way. We were going to take the I-8, but I changed my mind at the last minute and we continued down Santo Road. Chris started to cry because he thought we were going home...I swear his sense of direction is amazing. We passed our road and waved goodbye and the tears instantly dried up. He now knew we were headed to the playground.
We passed through two stop lights and all was well. You could feel the excitement in the car. I approached intersection number 3 and we had a green light. Green means Go, right? Mike yelled, "Watch out babe". I didn't see it in time. Someone ran a red light and hit us on the driver's side. My side and little man's side. I immediately look in the back seat and the kids are fine. Chris is a little wide eyed and Leila isn't phased at all. The other driver walks towards us and tries to open my door. It won't budge. I rolled the window down and he immediately asked if we were alright. We were and still are. We pulled our vehicles to the side of the road and out of the intersection. This is where I lost it. Mike got out of the car to change information with the other driver. I am pretty positive that I went into a light shock. My God, what if something would have happened to my children. The more I thought about it, the more hysterical I got. That is when little man started saying, "Don't cry momma." "I ok momma." "You happy Momma?" I looked in the back seat again and his little face was bright red and his eyes were watering...all because I was upset. I quickly composed myself and we all went home.
A couple hours later I received a message from someone I have not spoken to in years. I mean, it has been since high school since we have talked. Well, she had a dream about me and she believes that when you dream of someone you haven't been in contact with for a while, that you need to pray for them. I am so thankful for that.
I have had most of the day to reflect on everything that has happened. I am not a religious person and I am not a big believer in superstitions or myths. Even though I laughed at the idea of the crow...a small part of me kept thinking about it and even more so now. Was it trying to tell me something?? Did it know?? What are the odds of someone dreaming about and praying for me when I haven't talked to them in years?? Makes a person think....
Later that day, I called my mother to tell her about my day. Of course, I had to share the story of the bird. She then explained to me how some people believe that Crows are Messengers. I looked it up online and sure enough, she was right. Countless cultures look at the crow as a harbringer of powerful secrets. The business of the crow is in both keeping and communicating deep mysteries. The crow is often heard to cackle utterances that sound like, "cras, cras.' The actual word cras is tomorrow in Latin. This information helps fuel the fire in that Crows foretell the future and reveal omens and signs. All of this brings me to this morning....
Mike and I packed up the kids to take them to Playtown, the indoor playground I told you all about. We stopped for gas and headed on our way. We were going to take the I-8, but I changed my mind at the last minute and we continued down Santo Road. Chris started to cry because he thought we were going home...I swear his sense of direction is amazing. We passed our road and waved goodbye and the tears instantly dried up. He now knew we were headed to the playground.
We passed through two stop lights and all was well. You could feel the excitement in the car. I approached intersection number 3 and we had a green light. Green means Go, right? Mike yelled, "Watch out babe". I didn't see it in time. Someone ran a red light and hit us on the driver's side. My side and little man's side. I immediately look in the back seat and the kids are fine. Chris is a little wide eyed and Leila isn't phased at all. The other driver walks towards us and tries to open my door. It won't budge. I rolled the window down and he immediately asked if we were alright. We were and still are. We pulled our vehicles to the side of the road and out of the intersection. This is where I lost it. Mike got out of the car to change information with the other driver. I am pretty positive that I went into a light shock. My God, what if something would have happened to my children. The more I thought about it, the more hysterical I got. That is when little man started saying, "Don't cry momma." "I ok momma." "You happy Momma?" I looked in the back seat again and his little face was bright red and his eyes were watering...all because I was upset. I quickly composed myself and we all went home.
A couple hours later I received a message from someone I have not spoken to in years. I mean, it has been since high school since we have talked. Well, she had a dream about me and she believes that when you dream of someone you haven't been in contact with for a while, that you need to pray for them. I am so thankful for that.
I have had most of the day to reflect on everything that has happened. I am not a religious person and I am not a big believer in superstitions or myths. Even though I laughed at the idea of the crow...a small part of me kept thinking about it and even more so now. Was it trying to tell me something?? Did it know?? What are the odds of someone dreaming about and praying for me when I haven't talked to them in years?? Makes a person think....
Monday, August 23, 2010
Best Friends
I love days like today. Sitting outside in the sunshine, with my bare feet in the grass, feeling the cool breeze tangle my hair. I love watching Chris and Leila be kids and run through the yard with not a care in the world. Just being free.
Leila goes to her corner of the yard where she keeps her pile of dirt. She loves throwing it up in the air and in her hair. She also likes to eat it. I love her little dirt filled kisses. Chris goes to his pile of rocks that he has collected over a couple days now. He brings them all to the fence line and tosses them into the canyon. As he does this, Leila twirls in circles and claps for him. She is his personal little cheerleader. Full of so much laughter and innocence.
Once they get bored with that, Leila runs into my arms and gives me a huge dirty hug and Chris sits down next to me and our tree. This has become one of our favorite spots. Chris grabs my right hand and his sister's left and says, "Best Friends". Now, this is the second time he has done this and my eyes still watered. It was a moment that absolutely warmed my heart. I know these days will not last forever and that saddens me. I just plan on cherishing every moment I have with them. I love them so...
Leila goes to her corner of the yard where she keeps her pile of dirt. She loves throwing it up in the air and in her hair. She also likes to eat it. I love her little dirt filled kisses. Chris goes to his pile of rocks that he has collected over a couple days now. He brings them all to the fence line and tosses them into the canyon. As he does this, Leila twirls in circles and claps for him. She is his personal little cheerleader. Full of so much laughter and innocence.
Once they get bored with that, Leila runs into my arms and gives me a huge dirty hug and Chris sits down next to me and our tree. This has become one of our favorite spots. Chris grabs my right hand and his sister's left and says, "Best Friends". Now, this is the second time he has done this and my eyes still watered. It was a moment that absolutely warmed my heart. I know these days will not last forever and that saddens me. I just plan on cherishing every moment I have with them. I love them so...
Friday, August 20, 2010
Bolt
I have decided that I am changing my son's name to 'Bolt'.
Yesterday we went with a wonderful play-group to the Chula Vista Nature Center. It was amazingly beautiful. You have to take a bus from the parking lot, to the Center, and I was very nervous since it was Chris' and Leila's first time on a bus ride. It was only a 3 minute journey, but those 3 minutes were full of wide eyes, big smiles, and absolute excitement.
Once we were off the bus, we started walking through some of the exhibits. Leila was in her stroller and Chris was holding on to the handle. You see, we have been teaching him that if he stays near us, and holds the stroller or the cart, then he can walk and not have to be strapped in a stroller himself. Everything was going wonderfully, that is, until we got to the Bald Eagle. That is when Chris decided he was going to run and sprint down a trail that was for employees only. Thank goodness for play-groups and quick handed Mommies.
We walked around a bit more and then decided to have a bite to eat. After our lunch, we decided to check out the Sting-Rays. This exhibit was amazing. It was an enclosed circular area, with a shallow-water tank, where we could actually pet the Sting-Rays, as they swam by. Neato, right? WRONG!!! This is where my son decided to run in circles, with me chasing him, as my face grew more and more RED. That is when I decided it was time for us to leave...immediately.
All of that brings us to this morning. We had to go to Wal-Mart and get a few things. I did everything in my power to make it a QUICK trip. After checking out, little man decided to BOLT. I was in such shock that he chose that specific moment to run away, that he got a bit of a head start. The automatic doors opened for him and out he ran, towards the busy parking lot. My heart fell and I ran with all my might. He had one more step to take and he would have been in the street. I grabbed his arm and pulled. I was so upset and had no clue how to react. So much of me was just full of relief and the rest of me wanted to spank the life out of him. I simply gathered myself and we walked to the car.
As I was getting Chris and Leila strapped in the car seat, he kept asking me, "Momma Happy?" and I would answer with, "NO, Mommy is upset". With his every question and my answers, he would cry harder and harder. Before I could get in the car I had to count to 10 and take a little breather. As I got in the driver's seat and started the car, he asked me one more time, "Momma Happy?" and this time I said, "Yes, mommy is happy now." He stopped crying, smiled, and all was right in the world. As much as they frighten me at times...I love them more than anything.
Yesterday we went with a wonderful play-group to the Chula Vista Nature Center. It was amazingly beautiful. You have to take a bus from the parking lot, to the Center, and I was very nervous since it was Chris' and Leila's first time on a bus ride. It was only a 3 minute journey, but those 3 minutes were full of wide eyes, big smiles, and absolute excitement.
Once we were off the bus, we started walking through some of the exhibits. Leila was in her stroller and Chris was holding on to the handle. You see, we have been teaching him that if he stays near us, and holds the stroller or the cart, then he can walk and not have to be strapped in a stroller himself. Everything was going wonderfully, that is, until we got to the Bald Eagle. That is when Chris decided he was going to run and sprint down a trail that was for employees only. Thank goodness for play-groups and quick handed Mommies.
We walked around a bit more and then decided to have a bite to eat. After our lunch, we decided to check out the Sting-Rays. This exhibit was amazing. It was an enclosed circular area, with a shallow-water tank, where we could actually pet the Sting-Rays, as they swam by. Neato, right? WRONG!!! This is where my son decided to run in circles, with me chasing him, as my face grew more and more RED. That is when I decided it was time for us to leave...immediately.
All of that brings us to this morning. We had to go to Wal-Mart and get a few things. I did everything in my power to make it a QUICK trip. After checking out, little man decided to BOLT. I was in such shock that he chose that specific moment to run away, that he got a bit of a head start. The automatic doors opened for him and out he ran, towards the busy parking lot. My heart fell and I ran with all my might. He had one more step to take and he would have been in the street. I grabbed his arm and pulled. I was so upset and had no clue how to react. So much of me was just full of relief and the rest of me wanted to spank the life out of him. I simply gathered myself and we walked to the car.
As I was getting Chris and Leila strapped in the car seat, he kept asking me, "Momma Happy?" and I would answer with, "NO, Mommy is upset". With his every question and my answers, he would cry harder and harder. Before I could get in the car I had to count to 10 and take a little breather. As I got in the driver's seat and started the car, he asked me one more time, "Momma Happy?" and this time I said, "Yes, mommy is happy now." He stopped crying, smiled, and all was right in the world. As much as they frighten me at times...I love them more than anything.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Great Idea
Today little man woke up in a fantastic mood. He looked at me and said, "May I have a great idea mom, please". He then went on to say, "Playground, bye-bye car, lunch, home". I took that as him saying those were the festivities he wanted to partake in today and in that order. I was impressed at how well he used his "manners", but I sadly had to tell him "Not today son, sorry". He just smiled and shrugged it off like it was no big deal. I wish I could do that.
Leila was a different story today. I swear that child is going to be the end of me. She climbs on everything...and I mean EVERYTHING! The kitchen table, the armrest on the sofa, the end tables, her rocking horse, her bicycle. Yes, her damn bicycle. She likes to stand on the seat and glare at me, while I watch it rock back and forth and pray that I can make it to her before she falls.
Together, the two of them, pure evil. In the amount of time it took me to use the restroom, they had climbed on a toy train, pulled the sugar bowl off the counter, carried it to the living room, dumped it on the floor, and devoured it. The only thing I could do was laugh. Both of their faces covered in sugar...it's too sweet to be mad about, right?? I love them!!
Leila was a different story today. I swear that child is going to be the end of me. She climbs on everything...and I mean EVERYTHING! The kitchen table, the armrest on the sofa, the end tables, her rocking horse, her bicycle. Yes, her damn bicycle. She likes to stand on the seat and glare at me, while I watch it rock back and forth and pray that I can make it to her before she falls.
Together, the two of them, pure evil. In the amount of time it took me to use the restroom, they had climbed on a toy train, pulled the sugar bowl off the counter, carried it to the living room, dumped it on the floor, and devoured it. The only thing I could do was laugh. Both of their faces covered in sugar...it's too sweet to be mad about, right?? I love them!!
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